[Deleted User]

Us again,
I see there are ongoing issues on the board, but if someone could kindly recommend some groups etc, we would appreciate it. Its hard being in a new province and not knowing where to start..we have no support here or know anyone who can recommend support. We also wondered where we could purchase Autism support ribbons etc…we have seen them on sites for the States but have found none for Canada..I will order them fron the US but would prefer to buy Canadian
Thanks, The C's

[Deleted User]

I must say it is a very sad state when so called professional lurkers (you know who you are) lurk around at our posts about our children. We're not bad parents wanting their approval, were parents of children who have a "medical disablity" out in the world with people (ie government lurkers) who have no clue about autism. When the child hits school age I am sure that is one of the most frustrating times for a parent. It's not the autism it's the inexperience of those around.

I believe that ABA offers the best chance for a child to succeed. In this country the problem is parents aren't treated with respect or treated as an equal member. For instance we should be an equal partner in our childrens' education. Just try and visit the school how many parents have gotten the cold shoulder? Just try and ask them a question and again many parents get this same treatment. It's just amazes me how little we parents have a say in our childs' education. We are talking about medically disabled kids here and all those government lurkers are concerned about is the money. Jerry Maguire's motto "show me the money" has never been so accurate.

Parents are strong and we are getting stronger. We have every right to be involved with our children in every desicion. I am not bitter, but having been in this world for only a year, as it was a year ago our child recieved this diagnosis I have already seen how things go. It's a long road and one I prepared to fight for. I am not interested in having my child in a instution so it's worth it. Over my dead body. So have a nice life government lurker. Long live FEAT and God bless you guys for being here for families.

I know we all feel this way that MSP is the ONLY one who should be providing services for our children. It would be great if the government ever took the bull by the horn and right the wrong. Doctors agree that MSP should pay for the treatments even if at a regulated cost. Social workers are the most inexperienced of the bunch. That's another story.

[Deleted User]

To anon who seems upset things sometimes go unanswered on the chat.
I think as a parent who is involved in a law suit with the government I have some perspective on why "some" things go unaddressed or answered on the CHAT and while I may be from Ontario, Autism being ubiquidis, so to is guarded climate in which we sometimes live.
I do not believe there will be a true flow or disemmination of information on Canadian CHATS until the law is settled with re to universal access to effective science lovaas based autism treatment.
I read two posts on here the other day both posted as anon btw and the first thing I thought was "plants".
You may not like the reality of how we live, but nonetheless there ARE government lurkers on ALL Canadian CHATS or other types of lurkers looking for one line that might be used against the children. This IS the reality of the current day.
Hopefully the para professionals and professionals on the list will try to understand that non response may be due in part to what I am talking about.
You have the absolute right to post as anon, and as someone pointed out, even if you dont' you could use a false identity, but if parents feel uneasy for whatever reason to not respond, perhaps you could think back to this post and remember that people who are anon have gone to great lengths to discriminate and harm our children and thankfully you will never experience what we feel on a daily basis and even moreover right now while tensions in this country are extremely high.
Yes this does affect the discemination of information, and that is sad. However we are not the culprits of that climate. We did not create this climate of unease and fear.
There are options if you don't get what you need from the PUBLIC chat. You could always pick up the phone and make a call to FEAT, I believe BC has call block available too so you could still keep your identity a secret.
There will be certain types of questions that send the hairs on the back of our necks up on end and you may think thats ridiculous how could my questions be interpreted as anything other than request for information, as I said sadly, and this may not even have applied to your post for info, we may be guarded for sometime and I would hope that non parents on the list would try to understand we did not chose this climate of suspicion it has been heaved upon us by individuals who in the name of justice or whatever misguided notions they have, who have and will continue to try to stop children with autism from getting what they need, in some cases using our own words against us.
Pls try to be understanding of this, as I live it on a daily basis.
You could also always call any FEAT or email any FEAT in the US if you are not satisfied with a response to a particular post, its always an option.
I do not speak for the parents of the CHAT in this post, only for myself. I am sure though some share my thoughts.
Hopefully one day it will be a full out ABA party and we will all be happy campers with no fear and free flow of information. I will look forward to it.
n . whitney
ps. I did not spell check this so no shots on my grammer etc k kids :-)

[Deleted User]

In response to anonymous who works with adults and who seems to be a bit upset that some/all of her questions were not answered:

I'm not sure who your employer is or what your questions were but I would like to mention that perhaps answers were not provided because most of us have children in ABA programs and we do not know anything about dealing with adults who have not received ABA.

I think it is great that you are working to broaden your knowledge of autism and ABA through participation on this board.

and for the comment about FEAT needing to work on fixing the situation of this board. THere is no FEAT regulatory body, no one controls the board. It is a free forum, unfortunatly this attracts people who like to inflame or cause problems. Many of us are highly passionate because we are so regularly abused by the system that when sparks fly the flame ignites.

that doesn't make it right though and I agree with all who have posted their disgust with the extreme negative comments.

You don't have to disrespect someone to prove them wrong.

Michelle

[Deleted User]

Re: Anonymous on Wednesday, September 25, 2002 – 09:52 am

I would like to agree with you 100%, I have posted questions, comments, and many times words of support and encouragement… but my questions have gone unanswered, and even ignored when I have stated any info about my employer, and not stated I have a child who has autism (I do not).
But I do work with/for many different people who are now adults and did not have the benefit of ABA,… no they grew up in institutions… I have stated how/why my questions were important, but have got the feeling of being unwelcome by having my questions ignored. Finally, I'd just like to say, in support of the afore mentioned anon, I too have joined this chat to support the families on it, and only hope the knowledge I gain of ABA can in some way help me support the individuals who are now adults, and did not have the opportunities everyone on this chat is (thankfully) able to pursue.

[Deleted User]

Re: Anonymous on Wednesday, September 25, 2002 – 09:52 am

I would like to agree with you 100%, I have posted questions, comments, and many times words of support and encouragement… but my questions have gone unanswered, and even ignored when I have stated any info about my employer, and not stated I have a child who has autism (I do not).
But I do work with/for many different people who are now adults and did not have the benefit of ABA,… no they grew up in institutions… I have stated how/why my questions were important, but have got the feeling of being unwelcome by having my questions ignored. Finally, I'd just like to say, in support of the afore mentioned anon, I too have joined this chat to support the families on it, and only hope the knowledge I gain of ABA can in some way help me support the individuals who are now adults, and did not have the opportunities everyone on this chat is (thankfully) able to pursue.

[Deleted User]

Hello from maple Ridge!
we are parents to a 7 yr old Autistic boy, and new to the BC area.
I am now in the process of "red tape" to get funding, etc, etc… my first question is, are there any good support groups for families in the area?
thank you …….
The C's

[Deleted User]

RE: THERAPIST WAGE/EMPLOYMENT
FROM PARENTED – ha,ha on my grammatical error

Just wanted to comment on the few comments I have received already. Thanks so much.

I have kept myself anonymous not really out of choice. I would have liked to me more personal, as this is more my nature. But because of a current problems with my therapists, I don't want to offend them.

As for showing appreciation with gifts, cards, baking, etc. I too make these gestures to my therapists. Therefore, I don't feel that this is area where I need to work on. I am glad to hear that this is not an area that I need to omit. I enjoy giving to my therapists a token of appreciation.

As for my suggestion of an agency. I wasn't thinking along the lines of the government employing them. I was thinking more of a private agency that would run simular to respite does. Only private. We could still pick and choose the therapists to join our team and the therapists training would be our responsibility because of the various consultants/programs/children but the therapists would know the basics of ABA training. Anyway, it doesn't exist…I just wanted you to know that I wasn't suggesting that we have just anyone deal with our children.

Thanks again to those who replied, please keep the comments coming.

Concerned Parent

[Deleted User]

I would like to address the issue of posting anonymously. First, people have been posting that this chat board is for FAMILIES to gather and share information. Sure, families definitely come first, but please do not forget the vast number of therapists, consultants and other professionals that support the FEAT families.

Second, so what if someone doesn’t post their name. There has been talk about it taking guts to post something and sign your name to it. To me, this implies that people who don’t sign their name are cowards. Anonymity is a vital aspect of this chat board. What you forget is that people may not be hiding their names from you. People may be supporting you at the risk of receiving reticule from co-workers, friends, etc. In that sense, it is in YOUR best interest to stop criticizing them for posting anonymously. Anonymous support is better than no support at all.

Now, as you say, some people may be posting to keep their identity hidden from FEAT parents. Frankly, who cares, as long as they support you. For example, I began to post anonymously because some FEAT parents began to criticize me for who my employer was, regardless of the fact that I SUPPORT FEAT. For me, I have received constructive and informative feedback to my posts, as apposed to the “get off our chat board” attitude I received before I began posting anonymously. If you continue to reticule people for posting anonymously, you are going to force them to start to use aliases (john doe, etc.). That way, they can continue to get their messages heard, without receiving reticule for who they are, or for posting anonymously.

Finally, I would like to address the point about people posting anonymously to bash or insult others. This is disgusting, and FEAT does need to keep a better handle on this. As I previously stated, I have taken my share of bashing and being insulted. I suggest a lower level of tolerance on the administration’s part, but I do agree with the previous posts, in that people who post anonymously in order to bash or insult are being cowardly.

[Deleted User]

re: therapist pay etc.

First of all I would like to address the disrespect you are receiving from your team. Heads need to roll to put it crassly. Once respect is gone, it is hard to get back. You are in charge, you the "boss" and your team MUST respect you. Particularly since it sounds as though you take on at least part if not all of the sr. therapist responsibility (my guess from your post).

You should continue to do job reviews but perhaps take more of an approach of I am reviewing you. Always be open to feedback but make sure they understand it is feedback. You run the show because it is your child.

And if they were professional, which it sounds as though they are lacking in this, they would not be discussing how things operate on another team. tHe runnings of a team are CONFIDENTIAL and not to be discussed idly by therapists. As parents we open up the doors to our private lives, and while I understand these therapists were comparing working situations, a therapy team operates in a world of professional confidentiality. But regardless, it doesn't matter how so and so runs it on such and such team. THis is your team, run it how you like as long as it is ethical and fair.

They come to work at your house, with your child, and as independent contractors they have a right to decide whether they like the way you run things. THey can give FEEDBACK and offer suggestions but ultimately if they don't like how you run things and so and so is so much better than they should move on.

And may I add that I hope your team did not call you picky, demanding or too organized?!?! I will also tell you that I am EXTREMELY picky, demanding and strive to be organized and would argue that this is why my teams are considered by my team and others who sit in to be excellent. I just would prefer the terms high standards, constructive criticism, hard working, informative, highly involved… efficient!

As for pay. I think Avery hit it on the nose when he said you pay what you can afford and what they are worth. We start at $9 an hour but we also give periodic raises. Others in our remote neck of the woods pay $10 an hour to start, and one family I know of pays $11. I have less of a problem recruting therapists than they do and in fact most of their team has come from my passing names on to them when I am full. In most cases, the wage isn't what attracts a good therapist.

None of my therapists are in it for the money. I am very fortunate to have some incredible people who do this because they want to make a difference, because it is good experience. Now this isn't to say that they dont' have lives to pay for, they do, they aren't purely good samaritans… so this is why I try to reinforce them with pay raises.

its all about ABA – the consequence (pay raise) can increase the likelihood of a behaviour reoccurring (them sticking around and working hard).

I pay my sr. therapists $14 – 15 depending on experience but started them at $12 back when they were not so experienced. I once had a sr. whom I paid $25 an hour but she was of a caliber that is few and far between. My sr. take on a big level of responsiblity hence the higher pay.

As for extreme behaviour. I don't think you need to pay more, although you probably shouldn't pay below others. It is harder to work with a child who is physically challenging but I think if your consultant is dealing with it and your therapists are trained in the intervention being used, they will be able to manage.

Reinforcement does not have to be financial. We try to remember to buy a heartfelt card when a therapist graduates university, or when they seem too bogged down by life. We occasionally throw potluck staff parties. When I bake things like cookies, I am sure to give them some. Back when my garden was thriving (who has the time?!) I used to fill their arms with zucchinis and the like. And I tell them, wow, I love the way you are doing that… or Great meeting today, you kept things on the ball. I like the way you handled that… If you truly mean and it comes from your heart then chances are it will mean something more to them than money.

And finally, if your therapist is in it ONLY for the money then chances are they aren't going to be good for your child. Your child deserves someone who wants to improve their life just because they are a good person. And if you find someone like that – DON'T LET THEM GO!!! they are more precious than gold!

Michelle (please no grammatical checks please, I type fast but inaccurately to get all of my ramblings out!;-)

[Author]

Posts