[David Chan]

So,
We had a self declared snow day at our house. Both kids are
nagging me to go outside to play in the snow. Me I'm not a real
cold weather kinda guy, but whatareya gonna do.

We get outside, I figure, better clear the driveway so the cars can
back out later today or tomorrow.

I start shoveling the drive, when low and behold the boy asks me
"can I shovel the snow ?'

you're kidding right? "hey, knock yourself out"

his technique needed a little refining but he got most of it done.

Well, "recovered", I don't know yet ?

for now, I got a kid to shovel my driveway,

And that, can't be a bad thing

Dave
Mr. P's warm and snow shovel free dad

[David Chan]

Dear Tony,

I too was very saddened by the onerous difficulties you are now
facing. I think the suggestions made by both Nancy and
Michelle are excellent. I would like to point out that you are not
alone. As regretful as I feel while saying this, a child with autism
is first of all a child who needs a tremendous amount of love,
support, understanding, and intensive intervention; this same
child also generates a tremendous amount of controversy and
negative politics, including those within families. All of a
sudden, everyone has an opinion, and they all feel free to share
it with you!! In some extended families, certain members do
not understand autism, the extreme necessity for Lovaas-based
intervention, and the need for a much more structured parenting
style—and they never will! If your family is in denial, you might
want to book another appointment with a pediatrician or clinical
psychologist to have your son assessed again. Hopefully if yet
another clinician verifies the diagnosis, your family members will
be more inclined to believe it.

Tony, if you are in an extended family situation, you may need
to entertain the idea of living in a more nuclear family set-up. I
completely agree with Michelle that if you can’t convert someone
to your correct way of thinking and that person or persons is
sabotaging your efforts, it’s imperative to drastically reduce time
spent with them. Otherwise you’re fighting a two-front war (or
worse!)

I was also very concerned about the SLP who tried to pin your
child’s problems on yourself. Please learn to trust the “gut
feeling” that you have that an individual, no matter how
enormously qualified they may seem, may be a toxic influence in
the situation, and don’t feel any regret in letting them go. After
all, you’re signing the cheques. A truly well-qualified
professional will not “badmouth” or “gang up” on family
members. He or she will diplomatically address areas of concern
in a way that’s positive for everyone.

Lastly, take care of yourself. Rent a funny movie, read a
frivolous book, or go for a walk. Give yourself a little time away
from your very serious life. Attend one of the monthly FEAT
meetings in West Van, so you can connect with other families
running programs. Hopefully you can find someone to chat with
about autism concerns and running a Lovaas program. In this
way you’ll feel a bit more supported.

Tony, I hope this is helpful. Believe me , you are not alone.
Many, many people go through this but just don’t have the
comfort level to talk about it. Hang in there.

Julia
Mom of Mr. P

P.S. Now it’s time to acknowledge the many relatives, friends,
and supporters of children with autism who HAVE shown
tremendous dedication to these kids and their parents by
attending court hearings, political demonstrations, fund
raisers, and the like. You’ve all earned a special place in
heaven.

[David Chan]

Hi everyone,

Hope everyone had a fun during the holidays.

I came across this quotation about government decision making,
I thought I would share it with everyone.

"Let's postpone this difficult decision to the next generation".
That's the natural inclination of political leaders.

-Jimmy Carter (President of the United States)

Just some food for thought

Dave
Mr. P's Dad

[David Chan]

Best of the season to everyone,

We just got home from Mr. P's X'mas Band concert. Boy was it
tense or what. As it were, he started with everybody else, and
he finished with everyone else. For those of you that didn't take
band, this is VERY VERY important. Good old Mr. P persisted,
and with mom's help practicing, he sounded…..well, he
sounded. Actually, he sounded pretty good, and all the parents
there thought he was pretty cool. And yes they know that our
boy is on the team. There is no denying it.

Which brings me to this point. Our kid is 12 going on 13, in
many situations he is independent. Tonite, his therapist sat
next to him, reminded him to read the music. For the most part
it was ALL him.

You don't stop ABA because he's an older kid. He making gains
everyday. We just keep adding expectations to the list,
remember, no guts, no glory.

Indistingushable from his peers, sometimes, not all the time. As
we left the concert at school, one of the his friends moms asked
if P's doing anyting over the holidays because her son would like
to hang out. That's pretty indistingushable I guess.

After the concert we went out for pizza. When we came out to
go to the car, Mr. P commented that the lights looked really
great on the store in the mall….unprompted, spontaneous.

Wow. What about this Lovaas ABA stuff………

Merry X'mas to all

Dave
Mr. P's Dad

P.S. Mr. P is in the X'mas play tomorrow. Well here we go again
I'll let you guys know what happens tomorrow, stay tuned

[David Chan]

Happy holidays to our friends in government

we know it won't be a holiday for our kids

keep up the good work people

Mr. P's Dad

[David Chan]

Hi all ,
Here's Robin

[David Chan]

Hi all,

here is a picture of our Robin in action

[David Chan]

Hi all,

here is a picture of our Robin in action

[David Chan]

Attention all FEAT parents in Richmond

Please contact me immediately at

604-275-4309

Dave

[David Chan]

Attention all FEAT parents in Richmond

Please contact me immediately at

604-275-4309

Dave

[Author]

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